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Posts Tagged ‘country’

1-1-2-yellow-onionsMaybe, just maybe, the shit’s that’s happened to me happened so I could share with you. I have no use for some of these events in my life. Some? things have taught me absolutely nothing. I’ve been an innocent bystander in my own life at times but when shit wants to happen to you, it shall seek you out and happen simply ’cause that’s what shit does.

You see, back in the day, I was somewhat of a party animal. Not that I was the life of any party but I went to a few parties back in my day. I was the mix and mingle type in an aloof sorta way. I came by these little social outings on account of my boy cousin, who was a year ahead of me and was my watchdog. We went to clubs and all kindsa house parties and whatnot. Good thing I was a good girl ’cause I’d seen a fair amount of things that should’ve been hidden from my innocence. Fair to give myself credit for having a fair amount of sense to some extent.

Well. I was at this little party in a real country part of Georgia. I think it was Vidalia, that little town that’s famous for onions, of all the damn places. Well, there, I found myself at this little party with my watchdog. I was probably in high school.

Okay. There I was, pretty much hanging against the wall like a pair of curtains ’cause I was trying to get a feel for these countryer-than-me folk. Time was ticking like it does and I soon got to saying to myself, “Damn Totsy, you looking this cute and nobody’s asked you to dance.” Yeah, I could’ve gotten out there and done my thing solo ?’cause I could move this way and that back then but well, I wasn’t in my part of town. So, being the Southern Belle I was, I waited patiently to be asked to the dance floor. It never happened. At one point, I went in the bathroom to check myself out. You know, to see if anything was hanging from my nose or stuck between my teeth. Everything checked out real fine. I went back out and continued to hang on that wall like a set a dusty drapes. A dance for Totsy never happened, which was highly unusual for me. I was like, “Shit, I’m only 17 and losing my touch.”

Well, it came through the grapevine that this distant cousin of my cousin who came to be associated with my family by way of a step relative, had it circulated that I was his girlfriend. Hands off, was what he’d told all the fellas. I only found this out a month after the party. The silly part of the matter was, not even this fella who was claiming me asked me to dance on account of him being shy, and really, he was too old for me but had a young way about him. Probably was that way on account of being a weed smoker, which has -never been a turn-on for me anyhow.

I can’t tear up the dance floor like I used to but it’s nice imagining I could. Then again, maybe these things happen so I can have a chuckle to myself every now and then. Either that, or one of those I-just-be-damn moments.

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Self-Portrait Copyright 2011 Totsymae

I have limited access to the internet, so you can say I’m in No Man’s Land. I hope everything is kicking by the end of the week. My clock and system is still off. I tell you what though, there are some things I can sho’ nuff appreciate about America. Like, going to a restaurant and knowing what the hell’s on the menu. I like these folks over here in the land I’m in but Totsy can’t get down with the unidentified foods. My whole body’s gonna be about the size of my leg by the time I get ‘way from over here.

The other thing about being in a foreign land is that I’m totally illiterate. No pun intended but I’m feeling right special ed. looking at pictures to know what I want to eat. I saw cockroaches walking on the sidewalk right along with me the other day. I mean, there were plenty of them and I feel right certain that if they had a mind to say, “Bitch, get out the way,” they would’ve. Have mercy on me for saying such a thing but that’s my story and I’m sticking with it.

I can say these are the nicest folks I’ve ever come across in my life. No such thing as race over here, folks. That’s a beautiful thing. You have to be here to know what I mean, unless you’ve had such a glorious experience before. I don’t know. I’m hanging tough, folks.

Realizing I’ve been evasive on where I’m at and all, I’m just gonna tell you, I was kinda miserable last week. Call me Waterhead ’cause I was crying and didn’t think I’d be here past the weekend. Anyhow, I’m okay as okay can be under the circumstances. I don’t want to say what I’m doing over here ’cause you know, I got a potty mouth and that don’t mix with what I’m doing. I’m twelve hours ahead of you folks on the east coast.

Guess where I am, folks.

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