Making the Cut

makingthe cut

It’s Grammy time, people and I am in the mix. As is such, I’m going Dutch, though I do plan on snatching up a single and available tux in the crowd, okay.

Ladies and gentlemen, one artist who won’t be in attendance is Justin Bieber. He’s dealing with legal and emotional issues at present. No, we do not want him driving anywhere. What I would like to see, Justin, is you enrolled in How to Be A Human Being without Money Whose Got Some Sense 101. Yes, I know you’re young and rich but this does not justify or excuse your behavior. You are putting lives other than your own at risk and any person who’s not so self-absorbed as you are knows this. Please, get a grip and stop acting as if the world owes you something. Pay for the help you need, so I can scandalize other people in Hollywood, okay?

Jennifer, as in Aniston, when is the wedding, darling?  The nation wants America’s sweetheart to tie the knot. I read that Fiance dumped you and then I recently read that you two secretly married. I don’t think you did and I need you to do me the favor of making the nuptials public in a massive way, so the rag papers will stop making you appear so fractured since your divorce from Brad. Aren’t you simply tired of the stories? You’re becoming more famous for the divorce than for your acting abilities. I just don’t hear much about this skillset you’re supposed to have.

Well people, the cameras are flashing and I need to sashay down the red carpet in this svelte red and purple number that I can barely breathe in. The work it takes to be fabulous can be as painful as it is costly. Stay or get beautiful, whichever is applicable to you, okay? I’ll see you at the after party…Oh, you weren’t invited. Pooh!

Always fabulous,

Beatrice from Apartment 7B

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13 thoughts on “Making the Cut

  1. Honestly, Justin is just behaving like any dumb teenage boy. Thankfully, I was smart enough not to drive under the influence of alcohol, but I had the same invincible mindset that nothing bad could possibly happen to me. The big difference between me back then and Justin Bieber is that he is rich and famous, so a lot of the consequences that would have come crashing down on me will never even come into play for him.

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  2. You are one gorgeous lady, Miss B! All elegant on the red carpet and all. I bet you blew the rest of the A-list gals away! And, like you I want Jennifer to be happy like nobody’s business. Except yours, of course.

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