“Aaliyah” Pastel on paper. Copyright 2013 Totsymae
I’m the worst breaker-upper in the world. It’s so much better (and easier for me) when folk simply figure it out. I don’t like having a discussion that something is over ’cause it’s so much easier (for me) for the other person to come to that realization on their own. I figure if I’m good at figuring it out, the other person should be able to do the same. Now, I know that’s not fair. It’s a coward’s way out and yeah, you can call me that when it comes to that sorta thing.
You may be saying to the computer screen, “Totsy, whoever in the world dumped you? You’re just so lovely and whatnot”. I do declare folks, I most certainly agree with you. I mean, why wouldn’t I? However, I’ve had opportunities at being the dumper and the dumpee. The latter end of that makes one feel like a bag of shit. It’s a rather natural and very uncomfortable feeling. I mean, shit is what you feel like initially but I guess a lotta folk get their turn at some point or another, unfortunately.
On another unfortunate side, I suppose folk can dump other folk at will. Whether there’s been vested time in love, friendship or familyship, folk get dumped.
I tend to slowly find my way outta the dumpster by staying busy. I mean, therapy could help me in more ways than one but then I’d have to talk about why I was dump-worthy and who really wants to have that discussion? I mean, at least I couldn’t back then. However, over the years, I’ve pretty much gotten my therapy via the Dr. Phil Show. I am so undump-worthy now, it’s not even funny. At least, I thought.
Now, I know you’re so saying to that computer screen right about now, “Totsy, what the hell’s going on down in that south? Should I break out my credit card and place an order on Flowers.com? I mean, what the fuck?”
It seems folks, I find myself in the dumpster right about now but not in the way we traditionally think about being dumped. Because I’ve been a bad breaker-upper, I suppose Karma has hunted me down and cornered my ass.
Bitch.
I'm an artist who's writing,mothering, blogging and doing a few other things under the sun. I buy toilet paper 99.9% of every trip I make to the grocery store. I'm a people watcher, so I know you're here but drop me a line anyway.
The end of a relationship (familial, friendly, romantic, professional) is always painful. Sorry you’re hurting. I’m wishing you many busy days to occupy yourself until you feel better.
Yep, it is. Some busy days ahead indeed.
Thank you.
If you can find solace watching Dr. Phil, then I really wanna know what’s going on in da South!
Or when I visit your blog.
Totsy, I feel your pain! This too shall pass and life will be better … someone fine and worthy is out there waiting for you. *sending virtual chocolate*
No. I wasn’t dumped in the love department. On the same note, I guess somebody’s out there but I’m not looking for him. Been kinda busy, I suppose.
It’s not about you, it’s me……… Hugs!
Okay….I guess that soothes it out a bit. Thanks.
Bitch indeed! I ran into a store today and saw an ex who dumped me. I played it oh so cool by hiding behind a rack of cards.
Good thing that card rack was there. You could’ve been confronted with an awkward moment.
LOL! It seems so cowardly now, but the moment passed and I must move on.
Whoever would dump you on whatever level and in whatever department, well he is simply not worthy. That is my story and I am sticking with it.
That is an awesome picture of a Aaliyah!
I hope things are seen your way soon. This one completely blindsided me. Had no idea this was coming.
Thank you.
Sometime good to rest. Heartbreak need time and calm. Love can make us content and can tear us apart. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Well, I shall do as you say. What else can I do at this point anyhow? Lordy mercy….
When I gave up on finding love. Love found me. There will be better days.
Well, it might be easier if it had been a love interest but that not being the case….
Totsy, whoever in the world would dump you? What’s happening in the South (besides the usual red-neck bullshit)? Flowers are on the way girl…You deserve em.
Those flowers will be well received.
I hate dumping someone too. I’d much rather be dumped. But I recently met someone who in essense dumped me when I thought things were groovy. I did not have that much invested in the new relationship, but it still made me feel funny. Not hurt, or upset, or anything remotely that strong. Just weird. Never mind. There’s plenty of other people out there to dump me for good reason. Move on, Sis!
Damn, Linda….Looks like you were dumped before you really had a chance. That not knowing why is the rub.
Honey, you will be OK. I just know it.
I’ll take your word for it.
Jodi’s right. But in the meantime, indulge your soul. Buy yourself a little something. Eat ice cream and watch a heartbreaking but empowering movie, like the Tina Turner biopic, What’s Love Got to Do with It. It’ll make you feel better. That’s my prescription!
You reckon so. I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster today and I’m ready to get off. Shucks, could be that I’m on the brink of “the change.” No telling.
As the song says, “Breaking up is hard to do.” But so are relationships–hard to do that is. I really like dogs (the four-legged kind).
Can’t go wrong with the 4-legged types.
Heartbreak is so tiring. Thank-you for being so honest in your post. Take time for yourself and it is okay to just sit and do nothing – your heart and body need the rest.
You said it. I’m exhausted to the point it feels like I’ve been running all day. I will rest. Thank you.
Can’t imagine anyone dumping you, Tots. It’s difficult to think of it now but one door has to close for another to open in life and relationships. Hang in there, Girl, you’re better off, I’m sure. Be gentle to yourself, pamper as often and as much as possible until your heart heals.
Yep. I got dumped to the 5th power. And you know, another one is opening. One that has me blushing all over the place.
Give me names, Tots.
I shall kick some butt! Xx