I want you good folk to know, while Mittens and I may have different accents, we kinda speak the same language. So, unlike regular, ordinary, common, everyday, average, run of the mill folk, I wanna run down how Mittens and I think along the same lines. You can interpret or misrepresent what I’m saying all you want but should everything go totally awry economic-wise, I want you good folk to know ole Totsy’s got friends in high places, alright? Don’t hate on a playa. Hate the game, baby.
What I’m gonna do here is give you some quotes that’ll go down in Mittens’ history and afterward give you quotes of my own. I love quotes myself, so here we go:
Now, here’s my spin:
I got a plan for America that’ll happen in America for the American people.
I believe I don’t know what I believe and I believe Americans believe whatever they believe, in America or the Americas. And you best believe dat.
Here’s another quote from Romney:
“I’m not familiar precisely with exactly what I said, but I stand by what I said. Whatever it was.”
If you think I made this up, check out the video, okay? I don’t have time to be sitting around lying on folks.
My spin:
I’m familiar with barely nothing precisely and I mean exactly what I stand by. Now, I’m going to the store for some eggs.
If you’re familiar with my policies which I’m hardly precisely laying out to the public, you’d know just about exactly what I mean.
Last but not least, from our beloved candidate running for the highest seat in the nation:
“I love this state. The trees are just the right height.”
Okay…Hmmm…Okay, I’ve got it:
That sticka butter’s yella. I think I’m gonna eat it.
Your turn. 
I'm an artist who's writing,mothering, blogging and doing a few other things under the sun. I buy toilet paper 99.9% of every trip I make to the grocery store. I'm a people watcher, so I know you're here but drop me a line anyway.
Romney does not have Barry Goldwater’s unequivocal “you know where I stand” . Obama really campaigned against Bush not McCain and is many times over the militarist.
Carrrrrl. We’re playing a quote game. You were supposed to submit a quote based on Mittens.
I’m new at this stuff. OK I’ll try again. “Remember the Alamo !”
“I like being able to fire people who provide services to me.”
Do you watch Jon Stewart? You gotta see tonight’s show on Romney. I rarely laugh and cry at the same time, but watching tonight I did.
I’ll have to catch that one on YouTube. This was the most creative writing process I’ve ever done. I’m exhausted now.
“That sticka butter’s yella. I think I’m gonna eat it.” Now, that’s downright funny in any accent.
Oh, I think Mittens is “familiar precisely with exactly” what he said, all right. His boys in the Senate get it. Why, just today they kept us from throwing away a billion dollars on jobs for them shiftless veterans! Hell, we can’t be redistributing the wealth in no such way as that!
Come on, Tots. The man’s just speaking code. Well, unless he’s talking to the brothers in Boca Raton.
He’s a funny man. He just doesn’t think.
Oh, yeah. I remember him introducing Paul as the next president. One thing for sure, it won’t be him. And Paul, well, he’s just there for the notoriety. He don’t know shit. Hell, I’d be tempted to do the same thing.
Sorry, Tots. Here’s my quotable Mittens quote:
“I believe in an America where millions of Americans believe in an America that’s the America millions of Americans believe in. That’s the America I love.” –Mitt Romney (January 2012)
Can I have two quotes? I forgot my very favorite…
“Join me in welcoming the next president of the United States, Paul Ryan.” August 12 in announcing his running mate…
“Corporations are people, my friend… of course they are. Everything corporations earn ultimately goes to the people. Where do you think it goes? Whose pockets? Whose pockets? People’s pockets. Human beings, my friend.”
Translated … “Corporations are owned by my friends (a rare form of human beings with no hearts) who have very deep pockets full of people they own making them money to put in overseas bank accounts. God forbid that peasants would have money”
Well, he’s right in a sense. Only thing is, folks are leery of corporations and he defines what that is. There are good corporatons out there to work for that take care of their folks but Romney wouldn’t be one of them and I feel the majority are much like him. Romney needs to work with things, not people.
You nailed it! I’m rolling! I’ve said stupid things, but these take the cake!
Yeah, I’ve said stupid things too but I usually stay quiet for a bit before I speak again. He’s cutting up on a weekly basis. It’s entertaining, yet baffling that folks look to him for leadership.
Girl, you should run for president. You got the dialog!
I’ve got some cardboard in the garage that I’m saving for my posters for 2016. Thank you in advance for your vote.
Mitt goes to the grocery store to get eggs? Doesn’t he have staff for that?
Of course not. That’s my presidential quote. I’d be a president who kept it real. You know, sweeping the kitchen floor, pumping my own gas, etc.
You have my vote Totsy!
You just can’t make up this stuff!
I’m not that creative to make this up. I think Mitt’s playing mind games. He’s really got some smartness inside of him. Somewhere.
Yeah…somewhere…I’ll let you know when I find it.
“I’m running for office, for Pete’s sake; we can’t have illegals.”
Poor Mitt, he has to pay higher wages for his household help and can’t have any illegals cooking, cleaning, and landscaping like… er… oh wait, maybe the rest of us don’t really have a bunch of household servants.
“I have some great friends that are NASCAR team owners.”
Now if that doesn’t tug at the heartstrings of all NASCAR fans, who I’m sure are great friends with team owners, I don’t know what will…
He really said that? Not that I should be shocked. But he’s so, well, creative? I’m just always amazed and perpetually baffled.
Totsy, here’s a link to my hometown newspaper, the Washington Post:
Washington Post: Dana Milbank
He’s telling the media (tongue-in-cheek) to back off, or else Romney will lose the election and, as a result, reporters will lose 4 years of these kinds of quotes…
We have enough reality shows to entertain us. But real life stuff like this for four years? I think the media should go even harder.
You know the media – self serving folks watching out for their own jobs. I’m sure they just want four years of this gaffing to stay happily employed, otherwise they may have to do a stint at the “reality” show circuit. I’m with you though.
Tots, when are you running for office? I can’t wait to have you unleashed in the political arena, and since I live really close by, maybe I can come visit you and all – unless of course those K-street lobbyists are trying to drown you in money…
Oh, no. I’d never fall into the political spell and get snatched up by lobbyists. I wouldn’t care how much they paid me. I don’t reckon.
I’m on my way to the store too. Isn’t American just the greatest place on earth? For Americans, that is. Don’t wanna be too specific as to who American’s really is.
Be specific.
I have to use a quote from Mrs. Mittens. “The dog loved it!” Uh huh. That kind of sums up both of them as far as I’m concerned.
Oh, mercy me. Two peas in a silly pod. Dinner conversations should be interesting.
You can’t make this stuff up! Love your versions, though. Campaign season is making me nuts!
I think he’s tired. Let’s use that excuse. Nobody’s this goofy.
Here’s one for you: “I like being able to fire people who provide services to me.” –Mitt Romney, using an unfortunate choice of words while advocating for consumer choice in health insurance plans (January 2012) I think maybe he was hanging out with The Donald too much…
Oh yes, I remember that. This man is soulless to the 5th power.
And The Donald, well, I liked him okay some years back but he keeps talking and has me feeling otherwise now.
Yes, that seems to happen a lot when people keep talking–I lose my fondness of them…
You know what is more precious than his quotes – that stunned look on his face that says ‘what do you mean?’ whenever it is quoted back to him. Most people know the instant they step in sh*&. It has to be explained to him. I’m starting to wonder…
Yeah, he does gloat that incredulous kinda look. He’s really living in a bubble and it’s gonna pop come November.
I’m quoteless and speechless
Mind-blowing, ain’t it?
As a ‘non-native’ English speaker (I’m from S Belgium, my mother language is French), I rarely have the opportunity to use certain words I read and consider very expressive.
Your quotes give me the opportunity to write one of those: I’m flabbergasted! – with my thanks
Lou
Flabbergasted is precisely the exact word you should be using.
Hey, I went to a club in Belgium some years back. Had me a good time. Didn’t see the city though but I remeber the band, raggae that is. was pretty cool
Great! I’m glad you have happy memories from here! (I also like reggae).
There once were some impressive Republicans. Really! Check your history books.
*Ahem*
Yeah, I’mma have to dig in the history books for that.
I’m working on it!
i heard john held hands last night with becky, while taking a sleigh ride together…
john what did it feel like to hold becky’s hand?
I don’t know, i had my mittens on…