Watercolor on paper. Copyright 2011 Totsymae
I wanted to see what all the fuss was on the TSA folks, so I took a little trip. Well, that ain’t all the reason for the trip ’cause there was no Denzel-like figure to frisk me up. Matter of fact, nothing frisky went on at all and I’m a tad disappointed, folks. All that research didn’t cough up nothing more than me walking a cold floor in my bare feet. Oh, my Mary Kay samples for exfoliating were taken. Folks can want the darnest thing from you, can’t they?
Now this ain’t got nothing to do with nothing but I just had to let you know that I washed my face with some of that Caress soap and it’s got my face feeling so good. And maybe it does have to do with something ’cause to sit on your bottom for sixteen straight hours of being suspended in the air is enough to make me appreciate the joy of soap and water. I never took it so seriously before but I’m feeling real smooth and refreshed. You really don’t have to go out and buy all that fancy and priced up stuff to keep yourself younger, folks. Just go out and buy yourself some Caress soap. I can now say that some companies acutally live up to their commercials.
My concern is my backside. You know, sitting on it for so long and the future consequences of that ain’t good for women folk especially. Always nice to have a little padding back yonder. Sitting on it all those straight hours like I did is like using a flat iron to your hair. I used to be right proud of what was going on back there but I’m about to hold court with that bitch now. Like, just sit the ass in the witness chair and have at it: Where the hell you take off to on the night Totsy went to the comedy show? Ass, where were you when she tried on that dress she thought she was gonna look so fine in and had to put it back on the rack? So, you mean to tell me you just stopped showing up on your own cognizance?
I’ve seen some men folk with asses that make me do a double-take. Oh, I get to hatin’ on them too. What gets me though is big assed men don’t quite get when to stop pulling their pants up. Why the belt line gotta be damn near under their arm pits? What’s up with that? And if you think it’s a pitiful sight to see them from the back, you must’ve missed the front. Ooooh folks, I’m just gonna spare you the details and let you use your imagination on that! Lord. Help. Me!
Sorry, I veered off again and lost my train of thought. Let me catch my bearings here and once I’ve kinda settled in and wrapped my head around this here town, we can keep company like we been doing. I ain’t quite all of myself now being here, so I’ve got some figuring to do. (Hmmm…why those folk on that TV talking so funny?)
I'm an artist who's writing,mothering, blogging and doing a few other things under the sun. I buy toilet paper 99.9% of every trip I make to the grocery store. I'm a people watcher, so I know you're here but drop me a line anyway.
Whew, you’re back! I was having withdrawal symptoms.
I know the big ass men of which you speak. Have no idea why they feel they must pull their pants all the way up. So, if you don’t mind my asking, where are you now with those funny-talking tv people?
You’re funny. All I can say right now is that I’m here.
I gotta funny feeling about those men highjacking their
pants up. Real funny feeling.
We missed ya Totsy!
Ha! If you think that fat-assed men pulling up their pants halfway to their man-boobs is bad, what do you think of fat-assed men trying to fit into jeans that maybe fit them 10 years ago, but now they’ve gotta wear them much lower with a bit of butt-crack showing and that big-ole belt buckle facing downward to the floor, all because their gut is getting in the way??? I’m thinking maybe the high-waist thing can’t be so bad…
Now where in the heck would you be where folks are talking funny on the TV?
I don’t think men who wear the too small jeans wear them all
that well either. Probably they don’t care if the butt-crack is on
display. And if there’s a gut involved, elastic ain’t a bad idea.
16 hours? Are you in Australia? My ass went somewhere, haven’t been able to find it.
I wish I could be in Australia right about now. You need to do
that inquisition too. Maybe it’ll show back up.
“a little padding back yonder. ”
)) XXXX
—Nobody can talk quite like you, Tots
Listen to you, Ms. Kim.
Totsy, I swear, you plum wear me out with all your adventures. Where did ya go? What did ya do there? Fill in some of these damn blanks.
I’ll fill in the blanks later. It’s been a loooong day, believe me.
I have nothing to say, I’m just glad you are back.
Thanks, Ariana. How you been over there? I need to
catch on my visiting. I’ll see ya soon.
I wonder what is the big and small, and which is better ????????
Hmmm…in the eyes of the beholder, I guess.
eyes of the beholder hmmm……, if one needs the specs??? lolzzz
Hold on now… Who’s needing some spec to see some tail? LOL!!!
That’s one big pancake if specs are needed. LoL!
lolzzz, my symptoms are on initial stage may cure. I love pacakes :p
So you’ve been traveling, eh? Good for you! Funny post about pat downs and no Denzel-types to facilitate the process. At least that would make us female passengers more cooperative!
Yep, I know it would make me wanna travel more.
I don’t know if fun is the word at present. I simply haven’t
been able to figure it out just yet, to be honest.
P.S. Hope you had fun!
What I don’t get (aside from the hiking up of the pants until there is no way to go) is the frontal adjustment. I mean it’s not as if they have an invisibility cape on. We can see them adjusting just as they an see us adjusting our knickers should we have a wedgie. But, I digress. I know you didn’t ask, but I love traveling. So many opportunities for adventure and story making. Enjoy!
Yep, I’m story making, once I kinda make some mental adjustments,
I guess. And I would so love to help those guys pull those pants
down.